You have seen how a heartbreak can tear someone down, for it surely is a dreadful thing. It would take a lot of strength both emotional and mental to rise from an emotional hole from a failed relationship you have undergone in your life. It is indeed, unimaginable how you have put your self out there investing emotions and putting your best efforts only to end up with so many disappointments and defeat.
It is safe to say that almost everyone on some point in their lives struggled with heartaches. Though the red flags might be obvious, it is for sure hard to take notice if you are wearing your rose-colored glasses. It is a common occurrence, you are not the only one. Countries even went to war because of love. It might be hard to admit but love brings out the fool in us.
Early on, while still drunk in love you seem to deal passively on destructive and toxic behavior, sometimes even ignoring them. You thought everyone has flaws and something minor won’t affect the relationship so much. You even convince yourself at times that you could help him “change” for the better because you are the one for him, although you are fully aware that many have tried and gave up.
You are trapped in a delusion that love can solve everything that there will come a day he will realize how much love you have for him and that he will eventually treat you better. To your dismay that day never came, you were still incredibly hopeful, still having such blind optimism.
It is a hard pill to swallow but everyone around you saw the signs that you choose to ignore. Even your friends started warning you but all their concern fell on deaf ears because you chose to listen to your heart. Alas, your heart ended up betraying you. You failed to see all those times when you always had to be the one to text him first, and then he would take hours, sometimes even days to give you a reply.
Then you find out he was never busy. He just never cared much about your time or feelings to be compelled to give you a prompt response. You failed to see all those times when he made you feel stupid and maybe even called you an idiot for making a mistake, and for never letting you forget about it. You failed to see all of those times when he never really gave you the chance that you needed to express yourself honestly and freely.
All he wants from you is silence. You missed the instances where he will only act nice to you when it is beneficial for him like when he needs to ask you a favor. You shut your eyes through all his false pretense and lies.
When in reality you knew deep down that he never intended to love you. He will dismiss any hope that he can reciprocate the same affection you are giving them and honestly, the future of you being together is somewhat bleak.
There’s always a dark cloud hanging over your head because he is quite clear that he is not inclined to meet your expectations. He does not care about your personal aspirations. By now, it becomes clear to you that he is the biggest mistake of your romantic life — but everything will be fine, because he will also be your best lesson, moreover you have to accept that sometimes, the love of your life comes after the mistake of your life.
Remember that every dark cloud has a silver lining: meaning that from even your bad experiences can turn out into something good and useful. If you try to open yourself up to the possibility, you will eventually meet someone who is going to love you the way that you deserve to be loved; the way that you have always wanted to be loved. At first, you’ll be hesitant, your guards will be up and you got so much baggage that it seems like your walls are impenetrable because you have learned from the past.
These hesitations will not hinder his sincerity if he is the right one. The future love your life should be patient with you, understanding where you are coming from and just waiting for your pace until you are ready. You’ll be surprised that he will stick with you no matter how long it takes for you to feel comfortable trusting again.
His patience and kindness to you will never be in question because you’ll feel it’s genuine. He is not going to play games, leaving you second guessing, it’s going to be natural for him to show gestures that you are on his mind from time to time. The issue of waiting for him to reply will be non-existent because he will not leave you wondering if you deserve a text back, in fact he will text you first. Communication with him will be easy. He will plan dates for you even offering to make you some home-cooked meals, he’s always want to try to impress you and show you how good it will be being with him.
He might laugh with you if you made some mistake but will never laugh at you. If anything he’ll be a gentleman and let it slide or soothe your mind about it. He’s going to be respectful through his words and actions towards you. Though he cannot grasp everything, he will try to be understanding. He knows and accepts that you are not perfect and just like everyone you have your flaws and it wouldn’t matter. He is ready to pick you up and help you through your healing. He will be so right in loving you, being with him will always be pleasant, everything will fit like a glove.
So stop dwelling on your past mistakes, be glad that you were strong enough to pull yourself together to leave in such a hopeless situation. Honestly, you must realize that when it comes to love, the perfect one is just right around the corner waiting for you. And there might be hiccups along the way but those wrong loves will help you determine what kind of love you need and deserve.